Gospel artiste, Tope Alabi has soared in her chosen vocation and fast becoming a household name. Married to Soji, the couple narrates marital experiences and why their union has lasted over the years.
For how long have you been married?
We have been married for over 16 years.
How and when did you meet?
Soji: We met around 1994. Then, I was working as a studio engineer in Lagos. She came for the production of some movie sound tracks. I was the one producing the sound tracks for her. In 1998, we were working on her first album, when I proposed to her to be my wife.
Tope, what was the attraction in Soji? Did you marry him because you thought he would be of use to your business?
Tope: No. I believe it was the plan of God for us to get married. Before he proposed, I never saw Soji as a man that had the standards I desired. Then, I was a ‘big girl’ in the movie industry. I have had experiences of many things in life. So, imagine a man, who was staying in one studio and working at all times! He was too gentle for my liking and his stature was not encouraging either. But I discovered that God’s purpose for our life must come to pass. Then, I never knew that I would be a vessel in God’s hands. I never knew I had His grace in my life. I never knew God had planned that we would come together and do exploit in His kingdom. I was just going about producing sound tracks for movies and I was not into any ministry. Really, I love my husband.
What made you propose to Tope? Did you know she would one day be a celebrity in the entertainment industry?
Soji: No. I am not God, so how would I have known that she would be a celebrity someday? We never knew that everything would turn out this way. But we give the glory to God for His covenant over our lives. Before I proposed to her, anytime she came around in the studio, I felt good. She is very lively and honest. But I never knew marrying her would have been possible. Even at over 16 years of marriage, I don’t regret marrying Tope. She is my choice forever.
How have you successfully worked with your husband? Are there times you quarrel over business issues?
Tope: For us to be in the ministry for over 16 years now is by the grace of God. The administration of the ministry has been assigned to my husband and I don’t poke about at all. Mine is to prepare for programmes. Whenever he gives the signals that all is set, I am ready. If there is a need for any material— either for my own use or for the home— I make a request and he provides. God has been using him tremendously for me and the ministry. So, at no point in time did we ever quarrel over business issues. The business isn’t mine but his (Soji’s).
Is it safe to have a business relationship with one’s wife?
Soji: Yes, it is. All you need is an understanding of each other. That way, everything is on course. There is also a need to understand God’s word which proffers that two heads are better than one. When you do, running a business with your spouse becomes very easy.
How do you separate business from marriage?
Soji: We have a management that is in charge of our businesses. Our concern is the home front. My wife and the children are important. At home, it is love and how to take good care of them. When we get to the office, we discuss business.
Do you get intimidated by her fame?
Soji: No, if Tope Alabi is famous, she carries my name along with her; why should I be intimidated?
Do you get angry at some of her fans who would go to the extreme sometimes?
Soji:Concerning her fans, I know who I am married to and I trust her to any length. She is a woman of integrity, a woman that fears God with a deep knowledge of Him.
Tope, Are there times you regret marrying him? Do you experience jealousy from him when you are with your fans?
Tope: No, my Choice is a complete man that knows what he is doing. I call him Choice because he was chosen for me from heaven and he moves above any circumstances he faces. So many times, he leaves me alone with my fans— they take pictures with me and I sign autographs. He would not mind and anytime they finish with their snapshot, he takes his property (me) along with him to his house. I respect him for his understanding nature.
Do you quarrel? How do you settle and who apologises first?
Tope: Yes we do, we talk it out and I will apologise.After a hug, we settle whatever caused it. The husband is the head of his wife. I must confess that God has been so faithful in our marriage and I give all the glory to Him alone.